Look, Ma! I didn't Fall!

Almost

First class all the way

Atlanta

Village Party!

Rough day

Mike says: Floating on a raft from Cuba...glad we made it!

Ally found someone to flirt with

'The Q-Tip Express'

Mike says: How does it feel to be the "dirty" Q-tip?

My shuttle back to the bubble.

Guess who the youngest one on board is...

Leaving Las Vegas

Ugh... Just boarded. Yammering little German kid sitting right next to me... And I NEED to sleep. Gonna be a long fiv

Fung shui?

Married!

Mike says: Congratulations!

Elvis lives!

Mike says: That is impossible! I just saw Elvis at the UDF on Dixie!

Hmm

Glitz!

Monorail

Mike says: Yes, but the Magic Kingdom this monorail stops at is a whole lot different!

Well, almost cops

Mike says: And once again, almost my ass...

Vegas cops beating some guys ass

Mike says: That was almost my ass...

Upgraded to a suit!

Mike says: That looks strangely like a guy wearing a t-shirt in a suite...

Worse than used car salesmen, but...

The timeshare guy gave me two tickets to this show! Mike says: That I will never see...

The obligitory time share pitch!

Mike says: As Eric sat down, he looked at the awkwardly dressed salesman and stated, "Look, I'm just here for the free tickets to the nudie show."

?

Mike says: In my world, the difference between a three star and four star hotel is the placement of the much needed crapper line.

High roller!

Mike says: After my receipt printed, the Luxor clerk apologized for the missed placed decimal point and missing zeros.

8:00 a.m. & the bar is open.

Not such a bad town, afterall.

Multimedia message

Mike says: "We made it", Eric exclaimed as her carried Tonya across the threshold, "Let the sinning begin!"

Don't rent Hertz!

What I'd most like to point out here is the notable abscence of 'agents' behind the sign telling me to wait for one. 23 people in line... One girl to help us!

Speed!

Mike says: Eric was at first skeptical when the tram driver said he could not let the speedometer fall below 55 MPH. But after seeing Keanu and Sandra run to the front of the tram, he knew this would not be another ordinary vacation.

Flight delays... The bright side.

Mike says: Life...The bright side!

No words

Mike says: A bitter solace still bites at Eric whenever he sees Goofy memorabilia. To this day he swears that he did not fondle the boy's mother in front of her family. Until you have worn the Goofy suit, you just wouldn't understand. The visibility, the heat, the size of those hands...

Chapter 2

Mike says: After once again saving the free world from imminent disaster, Eric & Tonya decided to celebrate by heading to Vegas!

Carts everywhere

Golf cart speed bumps!

Mike says: After having too many pints at Father Rollando's, Eric mistook the parking lot full of parking blogs for a roadway full of speed bumps.

Brewed in The Villages

Grandpa's Chicken!

Squish!

Mike says: Squish!

When in rome...

Mike says: I'm supposed to talk about your feet? Those are your feet right? I mean I really can't see the bunion and there are 8 10 toes. They sorta look right...

Recreation

Mike says: Remember, if we are going to hustle the residents, they can't realize we are this good...

Pursuit

Mike says: Fortunately, the identity of the getaway suspects was rendered easy by the full size license plate attached to the golf cart.

Does Florida really license those things!!

Dinner

!

Mike says: Perhaps this is the reason for that previously mentioned STD problem.

Beach bums

Mike says: No Nathan, The Hoff walks like this...

Meter

Mike says: Knowing Eric's penchant for forgetfulness, his family is forced to dress in appropriately named attire. Not pictured: Son #1, Son #2 and Gorgeous Wife